Lizard People Secretly Run The World And We Have Proof

We don’t get into politics too much here at Cracked. We don’t like being yelled at. We also don’t want to alienate anyone who doesn’t share our political beliefs (we’re all pretty hardline Jacobites here). But by far the biggest reason is the simple fact that none of it matters, because lizard people control everything. 

But that’s something we should talk about far more than we do, and it was with that brief that I was sent to track down one of these lizard people. Which was surprisingly simple. All I had to do was write an interview request on a postcard and drop it in the mail. Didn’t even need an address; they get it all. A few short minutes later, I was called and given the opportunity to interview one of the lizard people’s spokeslizards at their head office in Real New York. (Don’t look for it – it’s not on the map.) There I met Malok, an affable young lizardman, who explained how it all works to me.  

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