Bangor Police Bring In Stephen King To Help Track Demonic Car That Killed Woman

Admitting their investigation was at a standstill, local law enforcement officials told reporters Wednesday they had enlisted the help of bestselling author Stephen King to track down a demonic automobile accused of killing an area woman.

Authorities made the decision to contact the award-winning writer after failing to develop any significant leads in the case, according to a spokesperson for the Bangor Police Department. Though they say the 70-year-old’s often arrogant and prickly demeanor makes him difficult to work with, detectives confirmed they are hoping King’s specialized insight will help them locate the bloodthirsty and allegedly homicidal vehicle.

Full Article: https://www.theonion.com/bangor-police-bring-in-stephen-king-to-help-track-demon-1820848385

Yes, I know the article’s a parody. It’s the Onion!